That’s All I Can Say (Poem)

Everyday I’m fighting

Because I’ve lost the sighting

On my purpose to live

Myself, I can’t forgive

Because I’m depressed

And also stressed

With what I should “be”

Which makes me unhappy

I can’t find the light

And I’m losing the fight

To my inner demons

I barely have any reasons

To continue to go on

I want to be gone

Away from society

So they can’t look down at me

I want to feel alive

And also thrive

But how can move along

When I am not that strong

I need to have the will

And a purpose to fulfill

I sometimes hate being me

Because sadness is my only company

I let it get this way

That’s all I can say


… (Poem)

Why go on when there’s nothing to gain

All this is doing is causing me pain

But if I stop now, I surely remain

In a miserable life and going insane

I want to change my lifestyle

So, I can feel it to be worthwhile

But it’s very hard to even crack a smile

When I’m clearly living in denial

Of how much life is even worth living

Because of how much time I’m giving

To a purpose that isn’t my own

It’s like my life is a loan

To things that make me groan

In this life, I feel so alone

Why’d I let it get this way

I’ve let my life go astray

For that, it’s causing dismay

And I feel it day to day

I’ve got to get myself back on track

Because lately all I’m feeling is lack

And everything is out of whack

Because I haven’t got my old self back

“Where are you?” I ask

I’m hiding behind a mask

Taking it off, I’m struggling to do

And showing my true self is what I ensue

From these experiences, I’ve become anew

But what does it even mean to you?

More Christmas Kitties for Your Holiday Needs

Guess who? Gizmo! I’m not gonna not dress up the kitties; they’re just too cute in outfits. I don’t know which outfit is the best.

Isn’t she just so cute in pajamas? Here’s one more of her in these pajamas. 😸

There was this other Christmas sweater i wanted to get her but it was too small so I got her this one instead. Once I learn how to crochet or knit better and get extra time to do these kinds of things, I’ll go ahead and make her one.

I hope you enjoy seeing Gizmo dressed up. 😸

Zombie Frog (Zombie Kitty Project)

I have three zombie frogs to make and I’m almost done with one. I’m unsure of their personalities; I’m considering making them to be sarcastic, wise guys. 🤔 We’ll see what the final outcome will be.

As you can see, this is a very rough sketch of the frogs but it’s a general idea of what they’ll look like. That line above the center frog was an unwanted “detail” by my toddler. 😑

I decided to start on this guy. I’m eager to get all of them completed.

This is what I’ve got thus far. I’m not done but I thought I’d share what I’ve got at the moment. Hopefully the next frog post will contain all three of the frog sketches. 😄 Stay tuned. 🐸

If you’re not up to par with my Zombie idea, you can see the original here: Zombie Kitty and you can also see another character here: Completed Zombie Goldfish of the Zombie Kitty Project

Loser (Poem)

I’ve been here before

It’s nothing to be proud of

But I cannot ignore

My lack of self love

Because I feel like a failure

I’m good for nothing

And I have to endure

All the self loathing

It’s something I can’t help

Because I feel it daily

These are the cards I’ve dealt

I’m not living gaily

How can I live better

When I want to just die

Because I’m also a debtor

Which is why I break down and cry

It’s all my fault

Things are this way

That my life is at a halt

And I can’t see a better day

I’m the one to blame

Why I’m unhappy

And feel this much shame

Like my life’s a joke, so sappy

No Wins (Poem)

I can’t relax

I’ve met my max

I can’t carry on

The doubters won

I stop right here

I look in the mirror

A loser is what I see

Why can’t I be free

Of these ugly thoughts

In my head it rots

I can’t see a winner

I’m not even a beginner

It’s not even worth it

To climb out of the pit

I sulk in misery

Then scream in agony

Why can’t I be successful

Everything’s so stressful

I don’t know what to do

To make it through

This terrible phase

I’m in a daze

I need to succeed

So, I’ll take lead

With little motivation

It’s better than stagnation.


Tsk tsk tsk.. I’m sure this poem is self explanatory.

I fucked up

I made a mistake

I’m fed up

With the choices I make

I fucked up

I’m sorry for that

You’re tied up

From my mishap

You fucked up

Why’d you do it?

Now we’re hung up

By all your bull shit

You fucked up

What happened there

I’m shaken up

By your affair

We fucked up

We neglected each other

I just want to make up

And not be a bother

We fucked up

In different ways

Let’s hang it up

This is just a phase

No one’s perfect

We never are

Let’s not neglect

And stay up to par

We mended things up

I’m glad we did

Even though we’re broken up

We’re not livid

We mended things up

We saw eye to eye

Our oneness is up

And we grew from this lie

Completed Zombie Goldfish of the Zombie Kitty Project

I’ll admit it’s not the best clay work but you gotta give me some credit for being a first timer plus I’m working around a toddler who wants to put her hands on everything even though she has her own sketch pad with crayons and a load of toys.

You can see an earlier post of the Goldfish Zombie here: Zombie Kitty Project: Goldfish Zombie

I enjoyed making it. There will be more zombies to come. You can see my original here: Zombie Kitty

Stay tuned for more zombie goodness. I’m eager to tell the story but of course I must iron out the plot and details. Enjoy and thanks for your support. 😸😸😸

Getting into the Holiday Spirit

It’s Gizmo! These are just a few for now; obviously, it’s still December and I’d like to get her in different angles and better scenery.

How are you liking the Christmas trees? This one is totally cute, nevermind the stacks of letters next to her; this is just until I can get a better picture of her. 😸

Snowmen are cute but I don’t think she thinks so. C’mon, chill out, Gizmo. 😸

I think these candy canes are my favorite, for now. I’m pretty sure I’ll find more headbands for her and the other cats but this’ll do for the moment. Who doesn’t love seeing animals dressed up? 😸😻😻