Watch “How to Heal Depression, Clear Your Negative Energetic Blocks… Get Energy Again” on YouTube

I won’t go a day without watching his videos. 😄

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Piccolo? Wolverine? Piccorine?

So, years ago one of my friends have been bugging me to draw him a picture of two of his favorite characters in one, Piccolo and Wolverine, to be a “Piccorine.” I’m finally trying to draw it. It’s fun thus far, just trying to merge the two together. I can’t wait to see the final result.

Watch “How to Let Go of Your Past and Move Forward” on YouTube

I give a lot of thanks to Ralph Smart for helping me keep my head up. He doesn’t know me and I don’t know him personally but watching his videos and listening to him really does good for my mental health. I remember first seeing one of his videos when I was in a deep depression.

A couple of old pieces

My friend made a sketchbook and called it “Duh Wholly Bye-bull” back in 2010. I completely forgot I drew a couple of things in there. I do remember the actual book but I completely forgot I contributed to it’s content.

Her sketchbook. I always wondered about it and I was happy when she refreshed my memory about my drawings.

My two drawings below. Obviously, they’re not the greatest but I enjoy running into things like this.

I think I’m an “Ace”

I’ve been reading on asexuality for a while. I do believe I fall somewhere in that spectrum. I have no interest in sex and I have absolutely zero interest in romance. Sure, I can find a guy handsome but I can also find a woman beautiful yet to me, they’re the same; I have no sexual attraction to either of them.

I’m not a virgin and I do have a daughter but now that I look back, I have an explanation for the way things happened. I was 23 when I “lost” my virginity and I had what was supposed to be sex with him, only twice. I believe that was a self fulfilling prophecy because I do remember when I was 12, I didn’t want to lose my virginity until I was 23. As I got closer to 23, I got more embarrassed of being that “old” for a virgin.

I remember being embarrassed of being a virgin all throughout highschool because my unattractive and out of shape friends already lost their virginity and when I finally started working at my current job, I didn’t want everyone to know I was still a virgin. I was still embarrassed at my lack of sexual “experience” since my first partner had me twice; the first incident being under a minute. I decided to let a one night stand happen with a guy I had a crush on at the gym I was going to since it’s such a shame for a 24 year old to only have been intimate twice in her life.

Then I turned 25 and I technically only had sex three different times. I was still embarrassed and ashamed of my lack of experience. Then came along a gentleman that would change my life forever. I didn’t think much of him at first but as we started to get to know each other and he was showing genuine interest in what I had to say and displayed manners, I became infatuated with him.

Fast forward to a few months after that, we became intimate. I loved him and he couldn’t do any wrong so I let it happen. That doing didn’t end so well but I did end up having a daughter by him and I don’t regret it at all.

My sperm donor was the last person I was intimate with and it’s been almost three years since we were that close. I have no desire to be intimate with anyone not any desire to have romance in my life. I only enjoy platonic relationships.

No, I’m not heartbroken and waiting for my last partner to mend things with me and I didn’t let him “ruin my views on relationships;” I just really think I’m an ace. I’ve never really had an actual relationship that lasted at least a year and I’ve only had three partners in my life. I don’t crave sex or romance. I may say things in jest about an attractive man, but I don’t act out on it. I’ve only had one crush since my last partner and I do believe the cause of the crush was not only to have something to look forward to at work but also the taboo factor in it (which I might mention in a later blog).

Handmade Ragdolls from early 2003

I’ve always been the creative type and a little strange too. These are some dolls I made when I was 12-13. Their names are as follows: SheCreature, Madam Shyla, and MonkEvil.

#Art #Dolls #Handmade

SheCreature: she was my very FIRST doll I made. I made her from some fabric my parents bought for me a looong, long time ago.

Madam Shyla: she was the second ragdoll I made. I’m pretty sure I made her out of a training bra. 😂 Her dress was made of old clothes we didn’t wear anymore. Her hair was made from fabric my parents got me (similar to SheCreature’s fabric, different color).

MonkEvil: I don’t remember which order I made him in but he sure is awesome. 😊 He is made of the fabric of an old velvet Barbie dress. The pink is from fabric of old clothes and his horns are from the same fabric as Madam Shyla’s hair.

These are treasures to me since they were some of my earliest creations. They’re about 15 years old! I remember making SheCreature and Madam Shyla before I turned 13. I really wish I didn’t let my artistic side die but I’m getting back in touch with it. Perhaps I’ll make newer versions of them but nothing will beat the originals. I have more handmade ragdolls that I’ll reveal in future posts.